I want to be loved
How can I find love so I can be happy?
Jen was sitting with her friend in Starbucks telling her how lonely she feels and how falling in love would make her really happy. Jen explained to her friend, “I really want to be loved and cared about so I can feel happy.”
There are millions of people who are in the same boat like Jen. They look for ways to be in a relationship so they can find happiness in their lives. If you are one of those people, you might know deep inside of you that you are lying to yourself and that you want to be loved so you can compensate for something else you are missing in your life, but afraid to do anything about it.
Does love give you true happiness?
There is no question about it that attracting a harmonious relationship into your life is something good. There is also no question that being loved for who you are does increase the happiness in one’s life, but as I explained in my book “How to win your lover’s heart” that before you get into a relationship, you need to be truly happy with your life and with yourself.
You can’t expect your partner to make you happy. No one can give you happiness except yourself. True happiness always comes from within, not outside. Still having a hard time believing this? Allow me to explain…
Imagine you are in a happy healthy relationship now, but you have a disease that you can’t cure. Will you be happy? What if you are in a relationship, but have many problems and issues with one of your parents. Will be truly happy? I don’t think so…
Real happiness is when you are internally happy regardless of what you might be missing in your life. The sooner you accept this, the better for you.
True happiness and love
Let’s find out the real problems and issues you will encounter if you get involved into a relationship for the sake of finding happiness:
1. You might lessen your true standards
If you are desperate to fall in love, then you might get involved in a relationship with any person who offers you companionship. This can be dangerous if the other person is not being sincere and in the long run, you will get hurt or you would have settled for someone that you are not very compatible with.
2. Wrong reasons
Usually when two people start dating, the emotions of happiness and excitement will be strong, but within time they will fade away if one of the two parties is in the relationship for the wrong reasons.
3. Unresolved problems will show up
If you never work through the root cause and the real problems, then these issues will show up again. When they do, it won’t matter if you are in a relationship because feelings of dissatisfaction will appear and you will start experiencing regret.
Solution to finding happiness
So what should you do to find happiness? Since real happiness is found within you, you need to start to learn how to love yourself more and change your negative self-image to positive.
Love is like a plant. It needs consistent, careful attention to thrive. Without it, your relationship is destined to wither away. How to win your lover’s heart was released by 2achieveyourgoals.com to help you win and capture your lover’s heart and avoid breakups. To check 2achieveyourgoals.com books, click here
For more information, read:
How to restore love in a relationship?
How to mend a broken relationship?
Losing interest in a relationship
I totally agree with this comment ‘No one can give you happiness except yourself.’ and I’d also say that it’s hard for anyone to really love you if you don’t love yourself!
Carolyn Hughes recently posted..Love me? Love me not?
So true, Dia. The most important thing we can do for ourselves, to have a harmonious relationship, is to give our self-esteem a boost – we simply must feel good about ourselves. When we feel good about ourself, it’s much easier to feel confident and authentic in a relationship. Actually, when we boost our self-esteem, it’s much easier to feel confident with any endeavor.
rob white recently posted..Nothing Can Stop You … Except You
I agree that nobody can give you happiness unless you give it to yourself first. After all, if you are happy with yourself, you will be more appealing to others. This is an important step for our self development. Learning how to live with yourself is learning how to love.
Dia: It has been a long time since I been around the blogosphere, but I think that it is amazing that you are still helping this world understand love. Love is something that I try to understand more and more everyday. I could not agree more with what you said in this post. For some odd reason, most of the relationships I have been in have been with girls that only live with their mother. Those seem to have always been the type of girls I attract, but In the process I have noticed something. Like for instance, after we broke up they would instanly be in another relationship. Most believed that another person could help them love themselves, but I know that is not the case. One has to be happy, at peace and love themselves first.
Anyways, amazing post man keep up the good work!
William Veasley recently posted..The Pursuit of Happiness
Thank you Carolyn, Rob, Kristina, and Williams for your feedback and comments
Dia recently posted..The media’s influence on your body image