How to build Confidence?
How do you build self confidence? Why do some people lack confidence?
Confidence is a learnt skill. The confident people that you know are the ones that acquired this skill by themselves or by working on their lack of confidence. Confidence is one of the main crucial skills that all successful people have.
Reasons for Lack of Confidence
Why do you “lack confidence?” Lack of confidence stems from different issues:
1. You think people know your weaknesses and that leads to worry.
2. You feel shy and that feeling makes lack of confidence evident in you.
3. The use of negative words such as “I am stupid” or “I’m failure.” These are harmful statements that destroy your confidence.
Building self confidence
To build confidence do the following powerful method:
1. Identify what you are not confident of-
Are you afraid of failing? Are you afraid of success? Are you afraid of quitting your job? Are you afraid of not having enough money to live a secure life? Whatever your fear is, you have to figure out what it is you do not feel confident about.
Here is a little exercise for you, get a piece of paper and make two columns. Write down everything you are afraid of on column one. Remember to number each fear/lack of confidence your have. Leave the second column empty for now, we will get back to it in step 3.
2. Ask yourself why you lack confidence?
Now, think about what you wrote on that piece of paper and ask yourself why you feel this way. Analyze your thoughts and emotions. Once you find out why you lack confidence in that certain thing, you will know that all this lack of confidence stems from your thoughts. You can’t have an emotion, without having a thought prior to you experiencing the emotion. For instance, if you are not confident of getting a job you like, then you have to know why you think this way. If you change your thoughts, you change your emotions, hence you will not feel the lack of confidence that you have.
3. Change your negative words to positive words
Get the paper that you wrote on in step one and on the right side, column two, next to every fear you wrote down, write the opposite. For example, if in step one you wrote “I’m afraid of not having enough money,” change that to “I have enough money day and night.” If you wrote down, “I am afraid of failing,” change that to “I’m successful.” You get the idea, right? I am sure you do! Repeat what you wrote to yourself throughout the day. Whenever you feel lack of confidence in something, just switch to more positive thought. Remember there is always more than one interpretation to an idea or a sentence, so why not choose the positive interpretation?
4. Do not take everything personally
You have to accept that there are people who will not have the same opinion on a certain subject like you do. It is ok for someone not to agree with you, after all, that is what makes each one of us unique.
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